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How to Jedi Mind-Trick a Woman

Apr 09, 2013 04:03PM ● Published by tina

Obi-Wan used his words and hands to persuade others to believe what he said

Relationships by Terah Harrison

In the movie Star Wars, Obi-Wan Kenobi used the Jedi mind-trick to persuade Imperial stormtroopers to simply move along. He did this by just waving his hand and telling the guards what to think and say. Obi-Wan didn’t have this skill from birth. He went through extensive training to develop it. Well — and I’m speaking to the guys here — there’s a mind-trick that works on women, but it takes training to master.

When a man approaches another man to talk about something, he expects to state a problem and receive a solution. Problem solving comes naturally to men — no wonder many want to solve the problems that women discuss with them. This might be a mistake. Often, a woman isn’t looking for a solution when talking to you. If she it, she’ll ask for it. What she might be looking for is a simple connection through emotions.

The key to listening to a woman is a little phrase called reflective listening, which can sound like you’re just repeating back to your partner what she just said, but you’re not. What a woman needs is for you to understand how she feels about what she is telling you. Reflective listening isn’t about words, it’s about emotion. Her facial expressions, body language, tone of voice and pace of words can be more important than the words themselves. For example, if your wife approaches you wanting to talk, you may notice her hands crossed in front of her body, her foot tapping and a grimace on her face. With a tense voice she speaks of her day at work. Your first instinct may be to offer advice, but try to refrain and instead deduce her mood from the clues thrown off by her body language. Try throwing out an emotion such as, “That’s frustrating!” See what happens. If you’re right, score! If you are wrong, that’s okay too. Most likely, that’ll open up the conversation so she’ll tell you how she is really feeling. Either way, she is probably thinking you are a pretty great guy for trying to understand.

When women talk to each other they are generally seeking connection through conversation. When women talk to men, they are expecting the same. This is where women go wrong. It is important for women to understand that men are not wired to understand feelings through conversation, and it’s difficult for them to do so. It can be frustrating for men to not be able to solve a problem when presented with one. When talking to a man, help him help you by being up front about what you need in a conversation. This can sound like, “I don’t need you to solve this for me; I just need you to listen.”

Obi-Wan used his words and his hands to persuade others to believe what he said. I am not suggesting you try this exactly — waving your hands in front of your partner’s face will probably just make you look silly. The human version of this mind-trick involves identifying what she is feeling and then telling her. She will then feel validated, and you will become her Obi Wan. This is not a skill easily developed — it might even take Jedi-like training to master.

Terah Harrison is a licensed professional counselor and owner of Therapeutically Chosen, LLC, where she specializes in relationship counseling for singles and couples as well as matchmaking

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    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Gift of Lights 2017

    12/25/2017
    06:00PM

    The Gift of Lights is a Texas-sized Drive Thru light park hosted at Texas Motor Speedway with a p...


  • Interlochen Lights 2017

    12/25/2017
    07:00PM — 11:00PM

    "Texas Best" Christmas Lights (as voted by the viewers of the Texas Country Reporter TV Show) are...


  • Dine For Dragons: December 26

    12/26/2017
    07:00AM — 12:00AM

    Eat in. Take out. Help fuel Carroll Education Foundation with every meal on December 26. Restaura...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 4-8)

    12/26/2017
    09:00AM — 12:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 9-Teen)

    12/26/2017
    01:00PM — 04:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Extreme Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/26/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Unleash your inner elf during Vetro’s Extreme Ornament Help-Create events, *select dates and time...


  • Traditional Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/26/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Bring the kids and drop in for one of Vetro’s Traditional Ornament Help-Create events, *select da...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    12/26/2017
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    12/26/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    12/26/2017
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Gift of Lights 2017

    12/26/2017
    06:00PM

    The Gift of Lights is a Texas-sized Drive Thru light park hosted at Texas Motor Speedway with a p...


  • Interlochen Lights 2017

    12/26/2017
    07:00PM — 11:00PM

    "Texas Best" Christmas Lights (as voted by the viewers of the Texas Country Reporter TV Show) are...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 4-8)

    12/27/2017
    09:00AM — 12:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 9-Teen)

    12/27/2017
    01:00PM — 04:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Extreme Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/27/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Unleash your inner elf during Vetro’s Extreme Ornament Help-Create events, *select dates and time...


  • Traditional Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/27/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Bring the kids and drop in for one of Vetro’s Traditional Ornament Help-Create events, *select da...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    12/27/2017
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    12/27/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    12/27/2017
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Gift of Lights 2017

    12/27/2017
    06:00PM

    The Gift of Lights is a Texas-sized Drive Thru light park hosted at Texas Motor Speedway with a p...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 4-8)

    12/28/2017
    09:00AM — 12:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 9-Teen)

    12/28/2017
    01:00PM — 04:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Extreme Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/28/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Unleash your inner elf during Vetro’s Extreme Ornament Help-Create events, *select dates and time...


  • Traditional Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/28/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Bring the kids and drop in for one of Vetro’s Traditional Ornament Help-Create events, *select da...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    12/28/2017
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    12/28/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    12/28/2017
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Gift of Lights 2017

    12/28/2017
    06:00PM

    The Gift of Lights is a Texas-sized Drive Thru light park hosted at Texas Motor Speedway with a p...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 4-8)

    12/29/2017
    09:00AM — 12:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Winter Mystery Basket Camp (Ages 9-Teen)

    12/29/2017
    01:00PM — 04:00PM

    Calling all chefs! Cooking shows have nothing on Taste Buds Kitchen's tasty cooking extravaganzas...


  • Extreme Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/29/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Unleash your inner elf during Vetro’s Extreme Ornament Help-Create events, *select dates and time...


  • Traditional Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/29/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Bring the kids and drop in for one of Vetro’s Traditional Ornament Help-Create events, *select da...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    12/29/2017
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    12/29/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    12/29/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Gift of Lights 2017

    12/29/2017
    06:00PM

    The Gift of Lights is a Texas-sized Drive Thru light park hosted at Texas Motor Speedway with a p...


  • PARTY ON!

    12/29/2017
    07:00PM — 10:30PM

    Join us each Friday night for our weekly ballroom dance party! A great mix of ballroom, latin, c...


  • Extreme Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/30/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Unleash your inner elf during Vetro’s Extreme Ornament Help-Create events, *select dates and time...


  • Traditional Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/30/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Bring the kids and drop in for one of Vetro’s Traditional Ornament Help-Create events, *select da...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    12/30/2017
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    12/30/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    12/30/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Gift of Lights 2017

    12/30/2017
    06:00PM

    The Gift of Lights is a Texas-sized Drive Thru light park hosted at Texas Motor Speedway with a p...


  • Extreme Ornament Help-Create Events

    12/31/2017
    02:00PM — 06:00PM

    Unleash your inner elf during Vetro’s Extreme Ornament Help-Create events, *select dates and time...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    12/31/2017
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    12/31/2017
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    12/31/2017
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • Ring in New Years Eve at Truluck's

    12/31/2017
    05:00PM — 12:00AM

    This New Year's Eve (December 31), Truluck's has two options for diners to ring in the New Year: ...


  • Toast to the New Year with Moët & Chandon champagne and a five-course dinner in LAW before dancin...


  • New Year's Day Hangover Brunch at Four Seasons

    01/01/2018
    10:00AM — 02:00PM

    Start 2018 off right with an indulgent brunch and build your own Bloody Mary bar in LAW.


  • New Year's Day Hangover Brunch at Four Seasons

    01/01/2018
    10:00AM — 02:00PM

    Start 2018 off right with an indulgent brunch and build your own Bloody Mary bar in LAW.


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/01/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • Enchant Christmas Light Maze & Market

    01/01/2018
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    The Lone Star State is about to get a lot brighter as Enchant, The World's Largest Christmas Ligh...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/01/2018
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/02/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/02/2018
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/03/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/03/2018
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/04/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/04/2018
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/05/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/05/2018
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/06/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/06/2018
    05:00PM — 11:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/07/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/07/2018
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


  • Holiday in the Park 2017

    01/08/2018
    02:00PM — 10:00PM

    Holiday in the Park is back for select days from November 17-January 7 at Six Flags Over Texas. I...


  • 2017 Magical Winter Lights

    01/08/2018
    05:00PM — 10:00PM

    Magical Winter Lights is a spectacular, larger-than-life festival that presents a fresh multicult...


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